It is hard to read the newspaper or listen to the news on radio or TV, or even read Facebook posts, go to seminars, listen to people talk, without hearing blame. For goodness sake, I do not need to go outside of my own head to hear chastisements of blame running on a regular cycle.

For those of you who know me, I try my best to show up transparently, to be vulnerable, to share my point of view not as a teacher but as someone who is figuring stuff out along the way, and so it is with that in mind that I write this post today. I write this from my heart knowing full well it might be misunderstood, and yet, when the soul speaks, after all these years, I know better than to not listen. It doesn’t take a visionary to see times are changing. We are finding our voice.

Movements like the Women’s March, #MeToo, and the student-led March for Our Lives have given voice to those who have felt voiceless. It is long overdue and important for everyone to be heard. I am entirely for this, for no one is above the law. These movements have allowed “We, the people” to speak out. So it is with the utmost respect for the change that is happening that I continue.

The question is no longer do we have a voice, but rather how our voice can make a difference. To me, one of the most important changes that is happening is the shift from the patriarchal model to the matriarchal model. What has been a male-dominated society is now shifting to one in which women will and are needed to lead. And the model of feminine leadership cannot be male leadership in a feminine body.

It might need to transition this way, but if we remain caught in this model we will not have grown, we will have just become another Animal Farm culture. It is time for male dominance to end. Time for right and wrong—to no longer be blamed, but loved. I can tell you that, from my point of view, when I am blamed, I get defensive. When I am loved, I melt.

The way of the masculine is to fight, whereas the way of the feminine is to love—and our world is in desperate need of the feminine way. This is the shift that is coming, and in order for this to take place, we must find the new paradigm rather than just model the old paradigm that brought us to this problem.

Blame is the old paradigm. Love is the new paradigm. It is time for us to listen to one another, to help each other see what is right, by lovingly modeling this behavior, rather than by fighting (which is the masculine model) and blaming. I know the pain that we have all felt, and I know how important it is to feel heard and to stop this behavior so that others do not have to experience it.

I understand the world of “YOU vs. ME.” I have lived in this world and know it very well, but I believe there is a new world that is wanting to be born, and I ask this simple question: How would we act in a “WE” world, not a “YOU vs. ME” world? How would WE as one entity respond? Who would blame who, when WE are the same? And how could WE move forward?